i am tired of trying... i am tired of crying... i know, i have been smiling... BUT inside... i am dying... =|

I HAVE TO...
*forget...
**accept...
***move on...

one  (1) word can  sum up all the above three (3) words............CHANGE...
that simple word, "CHANGE" can bring various means... transition...transformation... etc.
however, there are two (2) different ways infront of me now...
which i HAVE TO choose...; either CHANGE FOR BETTER...oR... CHANGE FOR WORST...

Forget...

Forget past events that have made my heart ponder a thousands times...

Forget unhappy thoughts, that if not deleted would be a haunting memory for me...

Forget unnecessary thoughts that play tricks on the my mind...

Accept...

Accept criticisms with an open heart... =)

Accept bad results that come by as a LESSON that MUST be learnt and not to be repeated...

Accept that some things are just MEANT TO BE that way and i shall have not interfere...

Accept self -weakness and vulnerability...

Move on...

i should take a deep breath look into the sky and open my mind as wide as a football field... =)

i should be more positive, have faith in ALLAH S.W.T's guidance for what the future holds...

i have to move on, shouldn't wait anymore, and cannot give in...but just take move on and leave it FOREVER...

***I realize that TIME is not my friend...

I'm running out of time..., I realize... I need to take a step ahead...BIG STEPS..I need to cherish these last moments of university because time does not permit... GO FOR IT!!! JUST DO IT!!!

and when you start to miss me, remember, you are the one who let me go...

Penaku menari mencoretkan...
Sebuah puisi kelukaan...
Gurindam jiwa...
Cinta dan airmata...
Di kamar hati ini...
Masih ada sembunyi...
Kenangan yang tak mampu...
Ku lemparkan jauh...

Penaku menari melakarkan...
Gambar kesayuan masa silam...
Tinta bersulam biru...
Warna kerinduan...
Berkaca jernih ingatanku...
Biarpun dikau telah jauh...
Dari pandanganku...

Manisnya pertemuan...
Pahitnya perpisahan...
Segala kini tidak dapat...
Untukku bahasakan...
Semua kini kaku...
Tiada lagu merdu...
Setiap madah baris kata...
Bukannya lagi buatmu...

Kini berteman sepi...
Kini aku sendiri...
Suka dan duka...
Dalam meniti gelombang...
Kembara panjang...

Jauh melangkah pergi...
Tidak menoleh lagi...
Kenangan silamku...
Tinggal tertulis kini...
Dalam sebuah puisi...

Penaku menari membariskan...
Puisi sebuah pengalaman...
Gurindam jiwa cinta dan airmata...
Di kamar sepi ini...
Titisan membasahi...
Dan aku tidak tahu...
Pada siapakah untukku luah rasa...

123...123...123...

...time goes by a lot slower when you miss the one you love...

= |

...izinkan selamanya namamu dihati...

Telah aku terima takdir dari Yang Esa...
Tertusuk sembilu pedih hati terluka...
Terkubur impian kita bina bersama...
Terlerai sedah ikatan cinta...

Baru aku sedari siapa diri ini...
Sebalik suratan cahaya cinta yang sudah...
Sedalam renungan terlihat dalam diri...
Hakikat cinta yang sejati...

Kuturutkan cahaya dihadapan berliku...
Keyakinan di dada mengiring langkahku...
Jalinan bahagia iringan doa restu...
Di dalam jiwa cinta yang satu...

Jalanan yang berduri tetap aku gagahi...
Biar gunung yang tinggi pasti kan kudaki...
Detik-detik kenangan segar buat pedoman...
Sepanjang jalan taman impian... ohhh...

Selamat sejatera kepada dirimu...
Semoga berbahagia tanpa aku...
Izinkan selamanya namamu di hati...
Biarkan selamanya ku begini...

Sudah lumrahnya insan tak lepas kesilapan...
Maafkan dosaku lupakan detik hitam...
Sejarah yang berlalu jadikan perngajaran...
Menuju bahagia idaman...

123...123...123...

 

 

...the day you went away...

Well I wonder could it be...
When I was dreaming ’bout you baby...
You were dreaming of me...
Call me crazy, call me blind...
To still be suffering is stupid after all of this time...
Did I lose my love to someone better...
And does she love you like I do...
I do, you know I really really do...

Well hey...
So much I need to say...
Been lonely since the day...
The day you went away...
So sad but true...
For me there’s only you...
Been crying since the day...
The day you went away...

I remember date and time...
September twenty second...
Sunday twenty five after nine...
In the doorway with your case...
No longer shouting at each other...
There were tears on our faces...

And we were letting go of something special...
Something we’ll never have again...
I know, I guess I really really know...

The day you went away...
The day you went away...

Why do we never know what we’ve got ’til it’s gone...
How could I carry on...
The day you went away...
Cause I’ve been missing you so much I have to say...
Been crying since the day...
The day you went away...

The day you went away...
The day you went away...
............123............123............123............05

cukuplah sekali............1...2...3...0...5...

Di saat kupinta keputusanmu...
Kau masih menanyakan semalamku...
Bertanya tentang dia dan kehebatannya...
Sedangkan segalanya telah engkau tahu...
Tiada rahsia hidupku...

Di saat kulahirkan kekesalan...
Sengaja kau mengambil kesempatan...
Mengungkit perbuatan dan keterlanjuran...
Kau ulang bercerita tentang hati luka...
Membuat ku rasa berdosa...

Demi masa depan yang kita mimpikan...
Hapuskanlah kenangan yang mengusik perasaan...
Tiap kali memandangmu tak terhingga kesalku...
Maafkan aku sayang menodai kepercayaanmu...

Andainya ku dapat menarik kembali...
Detik-detik hitam yang berlalu...
Kesilapan serupa tak akan ku ulangi...
Cukuplah sekali menyakitimu...
Cukuplah sekali kau membenciku...

once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life, loves give us a fairytale…

=)

NOBODY WINS WHEN EVERYONE'S LOSING...

It's never enough to say I'm sorry...
It's never enough to say I care...
But I'm caught between what you wanted from me...
And knowing that if I give that to you...
I might just disappear...

Nobody wins when everyone's losing...

It's like one step forward and two steps back...
No matter what I do YOU'RE ALWAYS MAD...
And I, I can't change your mind...
I know it's like trying to turn around on one way street...
I can't give you what you want...
And it's killing me...
And I, I'm starting to see...
Maybe WE'RE  NOT MEANT TO BE...

It's never enough to say I love you...
No, it's never enough to say I try...
It's hard to believe...
That's theres no way out for you and me...
And it seems to be the story of our lives...

Nobody wins when everyone's losing...

It's like one step forward and two steps back...
No matter what I do YOU'RE ALWAYS MAD...
And I, I can't change your mind...
I know it's like trying to turn around on a one way street...
I can't give you what you want...
And it's killing me...
And I, I'm starting to see...
Maybe WE'RE  NOT MEANT TO BE...

There's still time to turn this around...
You could be building this up instead of tearing it down...
But I keep thinking...
Maybe it's TOO LATE...

It's like one step forward and two steps back...
No matter what I do YOU'RE ALWAYS MAD...
And I, I can't change your mind...
I know it's like trying to turn around on a one way street...
I can't give you what you want...
And it's killing me...
And I, I finally see...
Maybe WE'RE  NOT MEANT TO BE...

It's like one step forward and two steps back...
No matter what I do YOU'RE ALWAYS MAD...
And I, baby I'm sorry to see...
Maybe WE'RE  NOT MEANT TO BE...
123...05...123...05...123...05...

Disaat Aku Mencintaimu...
=)

Do you remember?

We never talked about it but I hear the blame was mine
I'd call you up to say I'm sorry,
But I wouldn't want to waste your time
'Cause I love you, but I can't take anymore
There's a look I can't describe in your eyes
If we could try like we tried before
Would you keep on telling me those lies?
Do you remember?

There seemed no way to make up,
'Cause it seemed your mind was set
And the way you looked it told me,
It's a look I know I'll never forget
You could've come over to my side,
You could've let me know
You could've tried to see the distance between us
But it seemed to far for you to go
Do you remember?

Through all of my life,
In spite of all the pain
You know that people are funny sometimes,
'Cause they just can't wait to get hurt again,
Tell me do you remember?

There are things we won't recall,
And feelings we'll never find
It's taken so long to see it,
'Cause we never seemed to have the time
There was always something more important to do,
More important to say
But "I love you" wasn't one of those things,
And now it's too late
Do you remember